A biography could be written about my father but would never be able to cover the breadth of his achievements and legacy he has left behind. The past seven days since his passing was a great testament to the type of person my father was. It was awe-inspiring to hear about all the stories about how much my father affected so many peoples’ lives, whether they would be dear friends and relatives or someone who met him a handful of times.
I want to thank everyone for honoring my father in the way in which he deserved to be remembered; with the respect and dignity that he showed to everyone he ever encountered.
I am sure there are many stories to be told and many great memories to be shared. I encourage anyone who would like to post something in reverence to my father to please do so. After speaking to many friends and family, there was so much I haven't heard before, which I would love to be able to print and keep with me forever. If you are having trouble logging on, please feel free to send an email with your comments to me at danieslevine@hotmail.com and I will be sure to post it as soon as possible.
Once again, I want to thank everyone for all of your support and love during this tumultuous time, it will never be forgotten. I know my father is with us and will continue to be with us forever.
17 comments:
Please find below foe the eulogy from his children:
Thank you all for coming. We know that some of you have traveled great distances to be here and we truly appreciate that. Since our father was diagnosed 9 months ago, the outpouring of love and concern from all of you has been completely overwhelming. The cards, phone calls, and visits have meant so much to my family – especially my father. You have helped make extremely difficult days much easier.
First and foremost we would like to thank our mom – from the minute our father was diagnosed; she became our father’s angel. Whether it would be keeping track of every doctor’s appointment, the endless medication, or every breath he took, she stood by his side at every moment, keeping him going each day; even if that meant physically moving him by herself when he became too weak to move on his own.
We have always looked at our parent’s relationship as an extraordinary example of how a couple should treat each other, with relentless love and respect. Thank you mom for being dad’s angel and being a rock for all of us. When life was at it’s most bleak of days, your rays of light really shined through.
In honor of our father, we will try to make this relatively short and sweet, because he would want it that way. He would much prefer us to celebrate his life rather than mourn his loss.
Fortunately and unfortunately, we have had some time to think about what we would say at our father’s funeral. We are fortunate because we have been able to cherish every second we were able to spend together since he was diagnosed.
During the past nine months a lot has happened, and we feel very lucky that he was able to experience Dylan’s birth and bris in this same temple and Dan and Whitney’s impromptu wedding.
It is unfortunate of course because he had to go through these past nine months suffering from cancer. But, we have been able to make peace with the situation and we all have had the opportunity to leave nothing unsaid.
In the beginning of our father’s battle with cancer we thought, how in the world are we going to explain to everyone the type of person our father was and by the end we realized we didn’t have to.
Through these tough times, it became apparent that most of you who sit here today already know the type of man he was. How kind he was and the generosity and selflessness he exhibited. Who knew that he had any time to be such a good friend to so many people, when he spent the majority of his time either at work or with our family?
Whether it would be from the countless phone calls from everyone, even from people he hadn’t spoke to in twenty years, or the cards that would arrive everyday, or the blog entries; it was very easy to see that he touched so many people in a relatively short period of time.
He would get letters from people, thanking him for his advice or just thanking him for being him…and every time, he never knew he had this long-lasting effect on them. He would say, “Whoever knew so many people liked me…I must be a pretty good guy.” The fact is we all knew this, but he never did because it came so naturally to him.
That is who he was…everyone came before him, especially his family.
His grandchildren, Molly and Dylan, were the apple of his eye and he was energized whenever they were around. Sara and Whitney were not just his daughters-in-law, they were his daughters. He loved them dearly and always took their sides over ours.
Even during his last days, he managed to put us before himself by making us laugh, when it was hard to even crack a smile. On my birthday, when he was barely able to keep his eyes open, he motioned for me to come closer…and here I am thinking…ok…this is the moment when your father gives you his last piece of advice that you will hold onto forever…and he says “Man, I really screwed this one up bad didn’t I?”
This is who he was, even when he was in such pain and total discomfort, he tried to brighten the mood because he was more worried about his family than himself.
We cannot try to explain in words the type of father he was or the type of husband he was to my mother. Everyone can imagine what an amazing father he must have been, but nobody will actually know except me and my brother. If there is one thing that we can put into words, it is what he taught us in our life together. He really taught us, not just by what he said, but by his actions, what it really means to be a man.
This is what we learned: Being a man has nothing to do with whether or not you cry or show emotions; in fact it is quite the opposite. A real man has no trouble shedding a tear. The truth is it takes a real man to not only show your love, but tell people you love them. We never got off the phone with our father or said goodbye without saying I love you.
A man puts his family first, no matter how difficult it may get at times. A man works as hard as he can to make sure his family’s lives are a little easier. He makes sure his children are happy and they know he is always there for them. He goes to all of their events, whether it is a violin concert in second grade, three basketball games in one day, a 4 hour baseball game, or even the extraordinarily produced plays in elementary school.
At our impromptu wedding in November, my father made a toast and said, “Treat your wife like a queen and she will then treat you like a king. This was something we were well aware of, having the amazing opportunity to watch how our parents treated each other day in and day out. A real man treats his wife like a queen because she deserves it…no questions asked. A real man makes the right decisions no matter how difficult they may be. All of this I learned from my father’s actions.
We may never be able to be as selfless of a person as he was or at least make it look as easy as he made it look. We may never be able to provide for our families to the same extent our father did for us. And we will probably never be able to affect the lives of as many people as my father did, but we will always try. Whenever we had a tough decision to make while growing up, our father would always say, “At the end of the day, you have to go to bed happy with the decisions you make in life.”
Now that we are a little older, we see how much this means…life is certainly not easy and we don’t think it is meant to be easy, but if you can go to bed each night knowing that you made the best decision you can make, then life is going to be much more kind to you.
Probably one thing that we heard more than anything else in the past 9 months was “What would our Mark do?” If a friend did something gracious or a family member schlepped back and forth to our house, this is what was frequently said. And if there is something that we can all take away from this experience and carry it with us for the rest of our lives, especially when we have a tough decision to make, we can ask ourselves, “What would Mark do?”
Dad, you will never be forgotten; you will always be with us. We love you.
Please find below our mother's eulogy:
How do you describe a man who has been everything to you? Mark was patient, kind, both giving and forgiving. His unconditional love for me was only equal to his love for his children and grandchildren.
He helped make me a more independent and strong person and showed me that I had special gifts. I felt privileged to be with him and help him throughout his difficult struggle.
Mark continued to be patient and appreciative and was always thanking people for helping him. I feel blessed to have had Mark in my life for the past 39 years.
He was and will continue to be my valiant and peaceful warrior and the love of my life. His love is unending and enduring and his memory and the life he led will hopefully inspire others to follow in his footsteps.
Please find below the eulogy that my grandma Fran gave at the funeral:
I’ve never spoken publicly before but there are things, one must do. First I thank you all
for honoring my son, Mark. You are all here because of your care and respect for the
man. He was the most wonderful son, brother, husband, father, grandfather and friend. I
want to honor my child and the young boy he was. One could never understand his love,
kindness and caring for his father, sisters and me. He was always there to help, care and
do whatever was needed for us. He never asked or needed anything for himself. He gave
and gave all his life. That’s the man you have gotten to known. Mark, Lenny and I will
continue to watch over the beautiful family that you provided us. I ask every one to unite
to eradicate this awful disease by supporting the cancer organizations that will be
mentioned later on so that no other family needs to experience what our family has gone
through. Sleep well my child. Your fight is over.
Please find below the eulogy that my uncle Les delivered at my father's funeral:
We have just heard the most beautiful comments a parent can say about their child.
However no parent should ever be saying these things in the past tense. Sometimes one
hears of siblings not getting along. Our families were very fortunate that we never had an
argument and were always on talking terms. A day never went by that Mark while
driving home from work would not call Hildy to see how things were doing. Even when
we visited him during the nine months of his suffering, he would always ask how Jennifer
was doing with her new job, Ali was doing at college and he always made sure to thank
Hildy and me for being there; and thanking me for taking care of our mom. Mark
exemplified what his father was all about. He was very generous and caring. There was
a time though when his generosity backfired. The families were meeting in the city to
take mom out for lunch and take a ferry ride around the city to celebrate one of her
special birthdays. Both families arrived at the restaurant at the same time but Mark told
me to take the parking space with no meter and he would park in the in door pay garage.
Who was to know that afterwards there would be a ticket summons on our car for an
expired inspection. I was thinking would he stretch his generosity a bit further and offer
to pay the fine. Even if he did, I would not have let him because we had been driving
with this expired inspection for over two and a half months. Mark was taken from us at a
very young age just like his father as a result of cancer, a terrible disease. He did not get
to enjoy his retirement years with his devoted Nicki and see his grandchildren, Molly in
dance recitals and Dylan play sports. However, along with Nicki, he raised two
wonderful sons, Jeremy and Dan who gave him two caring and lovely daughters; Sara
and Whitney. We know that Jeremy and Dan will carry on in their father’s and
grandfather’s footsteps. Mark, may you now rest in peace along with dad.
On behalf of everyone here I would like to extend our deepest regards to you and Mark's family.
I have to add on a personal note that I hope that everyone who knew him realizes how much of an impact he has had on all of us, myself especially. As a young guy trying to make it in the crazy business Mark was always there for me, whether it was a simple question or a solution to more difficult task. You could always count on him. I can't describe my sorrow in an email.
Scott Jelinski
I just heard the news and I am terrible sorry for your loss. Marc had to go through the unthinkable and the one thing that we all fear the most in life. Please accept my condolences to you and your entire staff and family.
On a side note, I just want you to know that he was instrumental in where I am today and that he helped me in a very unselfish manner when he did not have to. I was always appreciative for what he did for me and it spoke very highly of his character and class. I am sure that he will be missed by many.
Respectfully,
Eddie
So sad to find this out but he is now out of pain and at rest. He was a great friend of many and I will miss him dearly.
Kind regards
Ron Goglia
I'm so sorry to read about your father. My father was just diagnosed a little more than a week ago. I look forward to sitting down and reading your blog further to learn of the fight he took on and to learn of the fighters behind him. In just reading a little on your blog, already I can tell he was a good man and will not be forgotten among many. Thank you for sharing this hard time in your lives with others. It's nice to know when you're not alone.
Tiffany L.
Seattle WA
Below is a note from Poppy Lenny:
In response to your blog regarding personal touches with your dad I want to share the following with you.
You know of course that I felt that Mark was the son I never had. He was always concerned about me.
When grandma Fran and I used to come north for Passover it usually was cold. Dad would meet us at the airport and bring me one of his leather coats and a hat.
One year we went to visit Jeremy and Sara in Hoboken and took a walk to the harbor area. The wind came up and dad took off his scarf and wrapped it around me to make sure I was warm enough. Our only disagreements were about paying the check. He always insisted on
picking up the check. The few times he relented he purposely chose an inexpensive restaurant.
When we played golf together he was happier about my good shots than he was about his. When we visited on a Sunday and he played tennis he bought me coffee and
a bagel and the NY Times so I wouldn't be bored while he warmed up with the guys.
He always waived to me during the matches. Many times he would schedule time after his match so we could hit together. The last Passover at the house when he was so sick we took pictures and
the one I prize is a picture of Dad lovingly kissing me on top of my head and both of us saying "I love you" at the same time.
When I had my by-pass heart surgery, sick as he was he called me in the hospital to see how I was. That was typical of him to think about others before himself.
We had so many wonderful talks on all subjects both outside near the
pool and while watching TV. He was always talking about the pride he had in his sons and the love of family was always paramount.
Have a nice day!
Below is a note from Cousin Karen:
Dear Jeremy and Daniel,
I can't possibly be as eloquent as you all were in your eulogies. Mark was a special cousin to me, the oldest and only boy of our seven first cousins. He always looked out for us, protected us, and taught us. He was tall, dark and handsome.
When we were young and we'd play at his house he showed us how and where to ride our bikes, how to throw a ball and how to play all the street games. At my sweet sixteen party he was the only boy and all the girls lined up to dance with him and he patiently danced with each one of them. When he and Nicki got engaged they immediately came over to our house to show off the ring. My parents adored both of them.
When Jeremy was born my mother was in the same hospital, LIJ, in the final stages of cancer. In her last phone call to me she happily told me Nicki had the baby. Nicki and Mark brought newborn Jeremy down to visit my mom, a nice moment in an otherwise horrible time. When my father died four months later Mark was the first one there with me. I was 24.
I'm here to tell you that I know that right now his suffering and the incredible battle he fought are at the forefront of your mind. With time it will go to the back of your mind and you will remember the good times. Your father told more jokes than any one I ever knew. I always marveled how he could remember so many. He was so proud of you and so happy to see you married to your loving wives, and so blessed to see his beautiful grandchildren.
He was a devoted, wonderful son. He learned how to be the best father from his father, my wonderful Uncle Al, who was also the most devoted, loving son. He can rest in peace knowing all that he taught you will be carried on. With time you will smile and laugh and remember all the jokes.
With all my love to the whole family,
Karen
I knew you were going to give us the chance to post comments on this blog, and gave a lot to thought to saying everything I felt important to say, but truthfully I don't know where to start.
I can talk about your Dad as a big cousin to us when we were growing up, at Family Circle weekends and other family events, and in Camp Monroe. He was in a class by himself; always loving, funny, charismatic, to everybody. A pleasure to talk to - all the time. I remember the first time the family (at least our side of the family) met your Mom - everyone agreed she was the perfect complement to him. Boy were they right! But you knew all this.
I can talk about how we felt as a family 25 or so years ago when we as a family had to deal with the loss of a beloved family member who left us way before his/her time. It was devastating then, it is now. We've been blessed as a large family to have shared many more wonderful events than tragic ones, but the tragic ones do live on in our hearts, and none of us will ever forget those wonderful family members we lost. This blog will serve to remind us, and more importantly - your beautiful children - just what an incredibly great man Mark was. But you knew all this as well.
I can talk about how Mark seemed to have the best of both his beautiful parents, in every way. You may not remember your Granpa Al, but I'm sure you knew that also.
Lastly, I can talk about the sorrow we feel for all of you, for Janice and Hildy and their families; and of course Fran and Lenny. But you knew all this. We love all of you and only wish we could have done more to help.
You know our thoughts are with you and we hope that the strength of family support helps all of you through this.
Love,
Warren, Naomi, Daniel, Jason, Emily
Below is an email from a business friend:
Dear Danie and family:
I received word of your father's passing on Janury 3rd. It has taken me that long to attempt to digest this terrible news, before I could bring myself to visit the blog. I read about your dad's heroic struggle and felt the
enormous strength of his desire to prevail in the face of this terrible foe. I also felt the strength, support and love that you and your family
marshalled to see your dad through this with courage and dignity.
Unfortunately I was totally unaware of his illness until receiving word of his passing.
I knew your dad for many years as I was also involved in the addressing business for many years, before retiring in 2005. Hence I am somewhat out of the loop. I am sure that you are aware of his reputation in the business. He was a gentleman. A caring and concerned individual that conducted himself as a professional - always. Some time ago we shared a trip to Spain and
Morocco. I vividly recall spending some time with him while crossing to Morocco from Spain aboard a ferry. We talked about his early experiences in New York and how satisfying it was in starting his own business (combined with a lot of hard work).
I extend my deepest sympathies to you and your family. Your dad was a
special guy. I can tell that you loved him deeply and I can also tell that he returned that love tenfold. Please give your mom a hug and assure her that there are many, many people who share her grief and loss. Please also accept my sincere best wishes to you and your bride. I hope you find much happiness in the future.
Respectfully,
Fred Guidone
I found these notes posted on the website of the Mailing and Fulfillment Service Association of New York:
Mark Levine,
Tri-State Mailing Equipment
Saturday, December 23, 2007
Vendor, Partner, A True Friend
Memorial Contributions may be made in Mr. Levines' memory to:
United Hospice of Rockland, Melanoma Research at Memorial Sloan Kettering Hospital and Temple Beth Am in Pearl River, NY
"Mark was a truly genuine guy - he really cared about you and what you were doing, certainly willing to help you with anything and a man you really tried to emulate. Good bye, friend." Greg Wells, St. John Associates Inc. President, MFSANY
"Mark was an extraordinary friend to many. With integrity and loyalty to the core, he was at once the guy you wanted at your side in battle and the friend you wanted to celebrate with when the war was won. Many of us have different emotions since the news of Mark's passing. Grief, numb disbelief, downright sadness. But wallowing in our own sorrow is not the kind of tribute he would want, at least not for long. He would help us to dry our tears and then tell us to get on with it.
I feel blessed to have known him, an extraordinary man who we miss greatly." Carmen A. Ocello, President/COO, Direct Mail Depot, VP MFSANY
"Mark made me feel so comfortable when I joined MFSA NY. He went out of his to make myself or any one feel welcome .Although a short lived friendship I am happy to have know him." Debbie Sylvester, PSI, MFSANY Board Member
"Mark was a very positive guy. You knew where you stood with him right away. His ideas were always good, but his follow-through was even better. Mark got things done with little fuss or bother. He was a outstanding member of the Chapter and the Industry. He was always ready to fight for the right things. He'll be missed." James Prendergast, JWP, Co-Executive Director, MFSANY
"After I sold my business and moved to Federal Direct, I no longer had any influence on equipment purchases but Mark and I continued to stay friends. Not long after I was hired at Federal, I found out that Mark was partially responsible for Federal having hired me. When Federal was searching, it was Mark who told them about my shop, and that my wife and I were very creditable people who could be trusted. It was Mark who recommended Debbie to MFSANY as executive director. Mark was always looking to help people with nothing to gain. He will surely be missed." John LaGreca, Federal Direct and MFSANY Board Member.
Dear Nicki and family,
I am so sorry I could not be there for Mark's funeral. As you know, we go back well over 40 years. We were born 12 days apart. We shared so many good times together from teenagers through our early 20s. And although we spoke only once or twice a year as adults, there was always that bond of friendship that remained very strong. A Bronx kinship. I am glad we were able to see him a few times these past few years on our visits to NY.
All the things that others have said about Mark are so true. He was such a genuine, caring person. But what I will remember most about our relationship was the laughter. We were enveloped by it constantly. I don't know if it's because we did so much real goofy stuff, but we always laughed. I will choose to remember my dear friend that way.
Mark Fischman
Auburn, Alabama
Dear Nicki, Jeremy and Daniel,
I'm very grateful to have attended Mark's memorial service - Nick did a great job of keeping the old crew from Cheshire posted. Lately Mark has been on my mind often and in my thoughts so I wanted to visit the blog.
Our time together at Cheshire was very special. Mark was always a buddy and his positive presence was always felt. "C'mon let's go grab a slice" he'd say and talk about last night's Knicks game. He loved sports. When we traveled, Mark and I often had a chance to grab a game of tennis or go for a run together. Mark had a great competitive side to him which he relished and I cherished. Those around Mark knew him as a great manager and an accomplished businessman.
Life takes you down different paths and places. Though our time together was a mere decade from the later 70's and 80's, Mark was great about picking up the phone, checking in, seeing what was going on, "how's business" and providing the low down on our buddies. Mark was the switchboard, command central, in touch with everybody and providing the latest update. You see, Mark was the "blog" before blogs even existed. We actually talked a lot about family, Jeremy & Daniel, Nicki, travel. He loved you all deeply and you were always on his mind.
At the cemetery as I was reflecting on the passage of time, Steve K approached me and he said it best. "He was one of the good ones." Yes Steve, you're right - he truly was. We will all miss him and are glad to have known him.
best,
roman
Roman Kyzyk
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